2 posts tagged “the love guru”

The Love Guru. [Mike Myers is Pitka, an American raised by gurus on an Indian ashram who returns to his native soil to make a name for himself as a spiritual guide, where he's promptly challenged to settle a rivalry between two pro hockey players (Justin Timberlake and Romany Malco). With one of the player's marriages -- as well as the Stanley Cup -- at stake, Pitka must call upon his healing skills to mend the rift before time runs out. ~netflix] i really didn't like it. i gave it two stars. here's steve's review. he didn't like it either.

You Don't Mess with the Zohan. [Adam Sandler also stars as the titular Zohan, an Israeli counterterrorism soldier with a secretly fabulous ambition to become a Manhattan hairstylist, in this comedy he co-wrote with Judd Apatow (Knocked Up) and Robert Smigel. Zohan's desire runs so deep that he'll do anything -- including faking his own death and going head to head with an Arab cab driver (Rob Schneider) -- to make his dreams come true. ~netflix] okay, seriously? that was... bad. i can't believe that judd apatow and robert smigel helped write it. i won't give it just one star since i actually finished watching it... i guess i'll give it two. man, having to watch 2 SNL alums effe things up (see: The Love Guru) was just SO painful. sometimes they get things right, but when they don't? it's just REALLY, REALLY bad. save yourself. don't watch this movie.

.:What I'm Watching:.

Chuck, Season 1. [Chuck (Zachary Levi) was a computer nerd working at an electronics store. Then he opened the wrong email and downloaded subliminal government information into his mind. Now, this ordinary guy is running from assassins, spies and terrorists out to pick his brain. With the help of crack CIA operative Sarah Walker (Yvonne Strahovski) and a protector from the National Security Agency (Adam Baldwin), Chuck dodges bullets and international intrigue. ~netflix] kinda fun! it's not a smart show, but it's fun. i do have a soft spot for spy shows, though, so that could skew my rating a little... 4 stars. even if McG *is* the executive producer. oh, and also, i LOVE adam baldwin. :)

The Foot Fist Way. [A pompous control freak, small-town tae kwon do instructor Mr. Simmons (Danny McBride) finally loses his cool when he gets wind of his wife's infidelities. Facing meltdown, he sets out on a pilgrimage to see his hero, martial arts master Chuck "The Truck" Wallace (Ben Best), in action. But is the world ready for a meeting between these two black-belt egos? Expertly drawn characters and furious action make this a comedy that really packs a punch. ~netflix] oh, what a funny movie. 4 stars. i really, really enjoyed it. the characters were just awesome. and the acting was terrific. i realize though, that this movie may not be for everyone... so while *i* enjoyed it, i wouldn't necessarily recommend it to people.

The Forbidden Kingdom. [Kung fu legends Jackie Chan and Jet Li star in this exciting adventure about a martial arts movie fanatic named Jason (Michael Angarano) who discovers a mystical Chinese staff in a local pawnshop that transports him to war-torn ancient China. When he learns that the staff belongs to the mighty Monkey King, who's been unjustly imprisoned by an evil warlord, Jason joins a group of skilled warriors to free the captive king and return the weapon. ~netflix] well... the fight scenes were lots of fun (yuen woo-ping, the guy behind the martial arts in movies such as Hero, The Matrix, uhm, pretty much any modern movie with good martial arts in it. heh.) but dang... that dialogue was BAD. and the girl was SO annoying with her stupid talking in 3rd person bit. ugh. but, i will give it 4 stars... mostly because it was a gorgeous movie and it WAS fun. it wasn't great, though. not by any means. it's a teenaged boy coming of age story and i think it'll probably appeal to that demographic. as an aside, we saw Michael Angarano in another movie (Snow Angels) and i've decided that he is the poor man's shia labeouf. when i told steve that he said, "the VERY poor man's shia labeouf." hehe.

Heroes, Season 3. [The dark forces rise up and gather with even more strength as a rejuvenated Sylar (Zachary Quinto) joins them in their attempt to destroy the Earth once and for all in the third season of the riveting smash hit sci-fi series. Meanwhile, Nathan (Adrian Pasdar) and Peter (Milo Ventimiglia) try to pull their mother back from the dark side. Hayden Panettiere, Kristen Bell, Masi Oka, Greg Grunberg and Jack Coleman star. ~netflix] Dear Heroes Writers: we watched the first half of it at comic-con so we KNEW that the first half of the season premiere would be awesome... but, DUDE. did you HAVE to ruin the second half by putting in that line about "should've gone with Sprint" in there? really? i understand that you need corporate sponsorship... and don't get me wrong, i'm glad you're back with a vengeance in season 3, but that line totally made me roll my eyes and say, "ugh..." out loud. also, i hate maya. can you let her just DIE already? she's annoying and whiny. although, i guess without her, there wouldn't have been those hot scenes with mohinder. that was awesome. he is a beautiful, beautiful man. but now that we've seen mohinder in all his hotness, we can kill maya off. i thought it was interesting that you put her in form-fitting clothing this time around... perhaps to make everyone NOT hate her??? i dunno. just a hypothesis. oh, also, please stop introducing new characters. i'm getting confused. thanks. xo, g

The Love Guru. [Mike Myers is Pitka, an American raised by gurus on an Indian ashram who returns to his native soil to make a name for himself as a spiritual guide, where he's promptly challenged to settle a rivalry between two pro hockey players (Justin Timberlake and Romany Malco). With one of the player's marriages -- as well as the Stanley Cup -- at stake, Pitka must call upon his healing skills to mend the rift before time runs out. ~netflix] well, i expected nothing and got... well, nothing. stephen colbert stole every single scene he was in. and in case you do rent the movie, watch the special features. they were funnier than the movie. 2 stars.

Sex and the City: The Movie. ["Sex and the City" fans rejoice! Carrie Bradshaw and her girls Charlotte, Samantha and Miranda are back, and this time, they're coming to the big screen with this highly anticipated adaptation of the HBO comedy series. Golden Globe winner Sarah Jessica Parker returns as everyone's favorite columnist who, with her three BFFs (Kristin Davis, Kim Cattrall and Cynthia Nixon), braves the roiling romantic waters of the city that never sleeps. ~netflix] while i really enjoyed the series, i don't know... the movie just seemed like it was allll about carrie and honestly, i like the other characters better. sure they're all caricatures, but toward the end of the series, they had more heart and soul than carrie. oh, and damn. the movie was long. i guess they were just trying to wrap things up so everyone could have a "happily ever after" but sheesh. i didn't think it needed to be THAT long. 3 stars.

Snow Angels. [Based on Stewart O'Nan's novel, this indie drama starring Kate Beckinsale intertwines parallel stories about teenager Arthur Parkinson (Michael Angarano) and his former babysitter, Annie Marchand (Beckinsale). Once the object of Arthur's boyhood infatuation, small-town waitress Annie heads down a fateful path after enduring a stormy relationship with her estranged spouse (Sam Rockwell). The supporting cast includes Amy Sedaris and Nicky Katt. ~netflix] okay. i'll confess. i TOTALLY cried. i think steve secretly thinks it's funny when i cry in a movie. i think he thinks i'm silly. i'll show you silly, steve! *shakes fist furiously* heh. anyway, i thought that it was really good... in fact, read steve's review. i share pretty much the same point of view with him. 4 stars.

Son of Rambow. [Forbidden to watch TV or go to the movies by his ultrareligious parents, young Will (Bill Milner) gets a hold of a camera, and his mind blossoms in this nostalgic comedy from the team behind The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Set in 1980s Britain, the film tells the tale of the friendship that blossoms between Will and class bully Lee (Will Poulter) when the latter recruits Will to help him make a home movie inspired by Rambo: First Blood. ~netflix] really cute. also, i guess i just never thought about it, but i never realized that other countries had the crazy religious people. for some reason, i thought kookiness was just in the US. hehe. ps - jessica hynes (used to be stevenson) is the mom in this movie. she's an awesome actress. ooh, and so is ed westwick. you know, Chuck on Gossip Girl? ooh, i love him on Gossip Girl. seriously. i do. uhm... i lost my train of thought... oh yeah. Son of Rambow... it was really good... blah, blah, blah... 4 stars. hehe.

The Sound of Music. [The hills are alive with the sound of singing siblings and nuns! In Rodgers and Hammerstein's greatest collaboration, a feisty postulant named Maria (Julie Andrews) is sent to care for the unruly, motherless Von Trapp children. She soon tames them -- and finds herself falling for their stern father (Christopher Plummer). Oscar-winning director Robert Wise used stunning Austrian locations to transform the stage musical into a cinema classic. ~netflix] since i couldn't make it to the Sing-Along at the Hollywood Bowl this year, i made the kids watch it. and i will make mia watch it every year until she likes it, damn it! hehe. i still have fond memories of watching it with my parents and my older sister. we'd pull the couch out so it was a bed and we'd all squish on there with our Jiffy Pop popcorn and watch it. i loved it so much i had the tape and i wore that thing out... *sigh* i love the movie so much. 4 stars. btw, if you purchase the 40th anniversary version, it's got the Sing-Along version on there... which basically means that the movie is the same, but for every song, it's got the words along the bottom like karaoke. :D fun! 5 stars... of course. hehe.

Speed Racer. [Emile Hirsch (Into the Wild) stars as Speed in this big-screen adaptation of the popular 1960s-era Japanese animated series from directors Larry and Andy Wachowski, the minds behind the blockbuster Matrix trilogy. With the support of his parents (Susan Sarandon and John Goodman), his girlfriend, Trixie (Christina Ricci), and his onetime rival Racer X (Matthew Fox), Speed sets out to conquer a cross-country race known as the Crucible. ~netflix] i liked it. i thought it was fun and i liked the effects. it probably would've been awesome on acid! haha! 3 stars. matthew fox is yummy, but i think i like him better with buzzed hair. you know... the haircut he sports on LOST. mmm... matthew fox.... oh, and i think i would've liked it more if emile hirsch didn't talk. i'm pretty certain that the boy can't act. i just kinda tune him out at this point. oh, and did john goodman lose a ton of weight? he looked much thinner than i remember him looking....

.:What Mia's Watching:.

Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! A Tale of Tails. [Come join yellow-hued Wubbzy (voiced by Grey DeLisle) and his pals -- the pinkish Widget (Lara Jill Miller) and the purplish Walden (Carlos Alazraqui) -- for some delightful animated adventures in this collection from the popular Nick Jr. series. Tag along as his friends try to help Wubbzy iron out his kinky tail, win the Wuzzleburg Derby road race and steer clear of the soon-to-erupt Mount Fizzy-Pop. ~netflix] could there be any more exclamation points?! hehe. anyway, it's just cute and sweet! it's bright and colorful and slightly frenetic, but it's really entertaining for the kiddies. 4 stars. read steve's review: here. he's also got an informative episode recap.